5 Things To Do Now Before More Poop Rains Down in Minnesota
Imagine pulling up to a Caribou Coffee in Minnesota and having your endorphins all excited because soon, your favorite coffee is going to be in your hands. And then...fecal matter is dropped on top of your car. 💩 I wish I was making this up but it actually happened this week in Burnsville, Minnesota.
No one is confirming that the poop disaster that showed up on cars just south of the MSP airport is actually from planes flying over. Obviously, no one is going to say, "Yes, our plane had a malfunction and poop from humans sprayed all over everything as we were flying overhead". In fact, WCCO reached out to United Airlines and stated in their story that didn't know of any reports of an issue with fecal matter being dropped from the plane.
Since it happened once though, there is a chance it will happen again and if it does, I want you to be prepared. So, here are a few things that you can do to make sure the poop spray doesn't land on you in Minnesota.
5 Things You Can Do To Make Sure the Poop Spray Doesn't Land on You in Minnesota
💩 - Poop is a natural part of us but this is one item no one should be putting in their mouths. Next time you are around any airport in the United States, especially MSP in Minnesota, think about texting someone rather than calling them on the phone. Keeping our mouths shut at all times is now a vital part of our survival.
💩💩 - Bring back the poncho look! I know, the huge triangle shape cloak that goes over the body for protection isn't all that glamorous, but having poop in your hair or on your clothes as you walk into work isn't either. If you want to stock up, below are a few "classy" options on Amazon.
There are even ponchos for those that love to hunt!
💩💩💩 - A.B.U. If you are in sales, you know the term Always Be Closing. Now that we've had Poop Invasion 2023, remember A.B.U. That stands for Always Bring Umbrellas. Yes, they aren't just for rainy days anymore in Minnesota.
💩💩💩💩 - Wear a waterproof hat. I know this will wreck our good hair days, but so will poop IN your hair. Protect yourself. But don't skimp out and just buy a baseball hat or something that you'd wear to a gym. You'll need a good, quality waterproof hat for this because this is one liquid substance that you will NOT want leaking through to your scalp.
Canva[/caption]💩💩💩💩💩 - Become a remote worker and use DoorDash for everything. I know it is not ideal to be home 100% of the time, but, here are 2 perks. 1) You can now binge-watch all of your shows on Netflix while you are "working". 2) You will be e-coli free. Pretty sure those two results are a win-win for everyone in the path of the poop sprays.
Hopefully, the #PoopInvasion2023 was a one-time thing for Minnesota but just in case it isn't, those tips will help protect all of us in the flight path...if in fact it did rain poop from a plane. 💩😝 #EndThePoopInvasion